:: anne in the attic ::

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:: Monday, April 18, 2005 ::

Sixteen days! It's been sixteen days since I caught this illness-- and though it has pretty much left my body, what remains has left me voiceless and with an infection in my larynx/lower throat during what is probably the most crucial time of year for me to need my voice. The choir with whom I sing has its big Spring performance in less than a month, and right now is when everything solidifies as far as learning the music goes. What's worse, I'm also supposed to be part of this smaller group that is singing together, and I haven't been able to participate enough for them even to know how they sound with me. I am truly frustrated and am tired of just waiting around.

It makes me feel like an outsider, more so than usual. I mean, people are definitely sympathetic, but because I have to sit on the sidelines, it makes me feel guilty that I'm not pulling my weight, not upholding my responsibilities. What can I do?

I've been to the doctor twice, and was excused from work the better part of last week (going back tomorrow), and it doesn't seem to have helped. The doc says "refrain from talking, even whispering." Funny-- I didn't realize how much I do communicate during the day until now. So of course, I have not been completely successful at being mute. I'm sure that has slowed the healing process, especially the show I taped for my brother Saturday night, trying to yell over the noise and the bands.

Oh yeah, the show. Grant's band is improving-- but I think they could use a new guitarist. Fact is, DD just seems lazy, and I see Nolan and Grant up there working at keeping things together despite DD's inattention and tendency to overrun solos, play them in no particular key (which sometimes works and sometimes does not), and miss endings. I always thought Grant sold himself short as a drummer. Anyway, this is the second show they've had in this town (guess they've had a couple in Portland, too), with another coming up on the 30th. Favorite (or just plain tolerable) songs? "George Bush Is A Nazi," and "Alien Hunters." They're hitting the studio next weekend, I hear. Good luck, guys.

:: Anne 9:37 PM [smartass remarks] ::
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