:: anne in the attic ::

Create Your Own Countdown

:: Monday, May 26, 2003 ::

I skipped softball practice this afternoon, for interpersonal reasons. Things took a familiar turn last night, as I discovered that someone close to me has been up to the same old shit. I've dealt with this before, but this will be the last time. There's too much that's good in the world to spend time getting sucked into someone's repeated manipulations. If that sounds a bit callous, I hope it's only because this person has tried me so much that now I'm just feeling used up with regard to her. Ah, well. Last night was not a good one.

Today, however, I resolved to move in a positive direction... so I cleaned my house. Then I finally resurrected my indoor water fountain, put together the Shaker table for it to sit on, and cut a couple of choice bits from the yard to adorn it, ikebana-style. Later on, I ran a few errands, including visiting my brother's to care for his cat while he's in Portland this weekend. After that, this illness caught up with me again and I had to rest for a while, so I did some reading and a bit of paper-pushing. Not a particularly fascinating day, but with such low energy, I guess it's to be expected. In times like this, Nyquil is my saviour.

:: Anne 12:31 AM [smartass remarks] ::
...

Truly, the Talk Talk heroin albums were full of darkness, but with an intimacy and warmth that has always allowed me to explore that without reservation. I have been quarantined here in my den of technotoys and electronica since Wednesday night, when I began to battle a strange and sudden illness that swept me off my feet and into the infernal confines of my bed... and my mind. After two nights of tossing about in an achy sweat and a searing in my throat, I decided what the hell and visited my doctor yesterday afternoon. With a small co-pay (thank you, insurance) and a 45-minute wait, I found out that I do not have Strep or anything with a name, per se, except a temperature, a very raw throat, and a pounding headache. But it did get me a note from the doc to miss work today as well (that's three in a row -- a record for me), which means, with the holiday, that I don't have to feel better until Tuesday morning. Yay.

But I began to feel a little bored last night. I'd missed a softball game with quite a few friends in attendance on Thursday evening, and have been in self-imposed seclusion with the resolve that I will not come into personal contact with anyone until my fever breaks, when I will no longer be contagious. So I called a few friends to talk with people, and then I rented a couple of videos to pull me through. Even now, my throat is still hurting quite a bit (but nothing like it was), my head and body ache a bit, and I feel rather dragged out, but I do believe that the fever has finally broken. So I may drag my ass out to watch softball practice tomorrow afternoon just to see some people.

As for music, I finally opened the new White Stripes album I bought last week, and it was fanfuckingtastic. I also paid some attention to Phaser's "Sway" album, and for some odd reason, decided to pull out the two Talk Talk cd's after all of this time. Wow. I'd like to make a video with one of their songs as backing. But first I need to get a Firewire card and transfer cord (50 bucks at your local Circuit City, I'm told) so I can get more from my digital video recorder than just mpeg videos. Actually, that's all my computer can burn anyway, is mpeg's, using a VCD program (no DVD's), so I'll have to weigh that option against buying a whole new system in January, my target date.

:: Anne 5:44 PM [smartass remarks] ::
...

The photography session went well, and Mother's Day was a success. After a beer and some Woodstock's Pizza topped with bell peppers, mom and I went upstairs to the skylit landing, dropped a neutral blue backing against the railing, and shot hundreds of photos of her series of little female torso sculptures. After weeding out the unbalanced and the blurry, we ended up with nearly 80 nice photos that cover every piece she's done (except the ones in my house, which I will add later). I'm partial to the four Raku pieces -- they're just spectacular. In fact, I placed a call this morning telling mom that I hoped they were not for sale, but if they were, I was an interested buyer. The porcelain is nice as well, but I can't say there's even one I don't like. I told her she really needed to get serious about signing and dating these things, as mine each have a mere piece of masking tape with "Beth" scrawled on it stuck to the bottom of them.

Vacation #2 is officially underway. As soon as I down some more coffee and get my shit together, I'm heading over to Grant's for a while. The weather is kind of splotchy, but I want to cut the grass later if possible, and then this evening, I hope to do some cohesive work on mom's art photos. I scored the latest Jack Johnson album, and taught myself another song last night. And I almost forgot: Saturday, I finally purchased the classical guitar I had put on lay-away at McKenzie River Music. It's a Takamine C134S. I just love it -- the warm nylon sound, the delicate response, and the deep tonal resonance will add versatility and texture to some of my work. I did a test 3-track recording excerpt with it last night and was quite pleased with the result.
I think I will bring it, along with my beloved Gibson, to the coast next weekend.

:: Anne 11:18 AM [smartass remarks] ::
...

Ah, one more day of work, and then I slip into my second week of vacation. It's been a hectic week, and I'm ready to do some serious relaxing. The kickoff is Sunday, when I'll drive up to Corvallis to hang out with mom for the day. We'll probably have lunch out, and then I'll finally take the photos necessary to construct a digital portfolio of her latest series of sculptures (which are probably my favorite work of hers to date). Grant and mom had their time together when they took an overnighter up to Breitenbush last Sunday, which sounds pretty cool.

Last Saturday's concert was somewhat of a surprise. Things went wrong that I didn't expect; yet, other things went better than I expected. All in all, I believe it was a success. Due to a late work schedule, I missed the beginning of rehearsal last night, and therefore much of the feedback and year-end wrap-up talk. (Two people tried to tape it for me, but those little recorders just aren't very good at getting diction -- just sounds and tones.) One woman relayed a comment she'd overheard in the audience, where some man had said that we were pretty good, considering our "pedestrianism." If he only knew. I'm sure that so many people have no idea what this group of women give to each other in this choir. Most people just see a choir, but they don't see the intense community within it. My words are ridiculously inadequate when it comes to this; I cannot express what it has meant to me this past year -- and perhaps it's just as well. Some things feel so much better in their unsaid state. Yet today, I found myself thinking quite a bit about not having the choir all summer. And I felt rather bereft. Or perhaps I was just having a bad day. (Dwelling on interpersonal communications again, are we? Hmm....) There's just something about attending a rehearsal with fifty-some-odd other lesbian women all in a room together once a week. It's so much more than just a choir, but I think every one of us in it knows that. This is why, every chance I get, I'll be sitting in the stands for those softball games.

I blog, therefore I am.

:: Anne 10:08 PM [smartass remarks] ::
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It's a beautiful Friday morning here in the Pacific Northwest; the gods have smiled upon this vacation weather-wise. In fact, I've felt pretty good all week, even with all of the things that had to be done. I knew going into it, though, that this week would be my "working" vacation, and the one I've scheduled two weeks from now will be the "playing" vacation. Well, for the most part -- the lines between work and play are often blurred for me. Case in point: yesterday I washed my car thoroughly and drove it over to my brother's house, where I could wax and buff it unobstructed by falling tree debris. Now I know that seems like work to most people, but with the sun shining the way it was, that I was hanging out with my bro, and with the aid of an electric handheld buffer, I felt like I was playing. And Zooey looked pretty sharp afterward.

So, too, the yardwork I've been slowly fitting in. The yard looks better than it did, but there's still a long way to go before the courtyard's clear and the edges are as defined as I wish them to be. I keep meaning to hire someone to come in and do a clean sweep, but there's never enough time for me to arrange a meeting with anyone. Well, maybe next vacation.

Today, I plan to take care of a few loose ends (rotate car tires, iron, have guitar restrung), but mostly I am going over lyrics in my head and resting my voice for tomorrow. The choir did a complete run-through at rehearsal last night, and the night before, my section (the tenors) met to solidify a few things, so I have a pretty good idea what final cramming I need to do for tomorrow night's performance. And tonight, the bass section is going to meet here for a cram session. We'll have one more complete run-through tomorrow morning at the tech rehearsal, and then it's showtime! I must admit that it will be a relief when it's done. But for now, I will continue to perfect details as best I can right up until the curtain rises. The Hult Center, wow. Mom, if you're reading this, thanks for the piano lessons.

:: Anne 8:27 AM [smartass remarks] ::
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